They're a chonker for a reason @bearotonin-international and @thelittlest-lynx
Kermode bears are exceptionally skilled salmon slammers
beautifulcrownobserves asked:
You do have a tremendous amount of patience with all the little gremlins on this site.
neil-gaiman answered:
I guess I do. But you’d be amazed at how many questions I never get to answer.
me tryna find out if this fool died
“The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.”
Holy shit
And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore
Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!!
Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this
#AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS
I mean OP pretty much covered it. A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
But ask and you shall receive, On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD. YOU’RE DEAD. EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN.
There are many things that will kill you. [citation needed]
There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST.
There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in.
Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you). THE. WHOLE. OCEAN.
Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus.
It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these. But not without immediate medical attention. Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish.
The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you. There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide. It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis. It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly. It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm. Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the LD50 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)). This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you.
DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS.
Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE.
A cone snail walks into a bar. You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND.
Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra. Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin. Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it. Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough.
I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin:
Remember how the LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg? Conotoxin is 160 times more potent. FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.
I DID SOME MATH.
IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.)
Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.”
THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY.
And guess what? Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging. Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you. Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight. Oh no. It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON. It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria.
Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever. “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask. And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra. Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.” That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine.
Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin. In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock. BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE.
IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off. And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST.
And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death.
Don’t touch the pretty shells.
this is a WONDERFUL use of the medium of the tumblr post
YES.
A perfect educational rant.
Minute traces of tetrodotoxin are what makes fugu (pufferfish) sashimi such an exciting entrée. Improperly prepared fugu can be very exciting indeed, to the extent that the over-excited diner loses interest in anything else.
Like, for instance, breathing.
The end part
Can’t not reblog something this terrifyingly educational.
Me: minding my own damn business in the grocery store
One of my students and a few of his teammates enter the dairy aisle.
My student is holding hands with one of his teammates.
My student: Oh hey, Professor X!
Me, who has both my student and his girlfriend in my class: …Hello
My student, looking at his hand-holding partner: Oh! Don’t worry. My girlfriend knows. Not that I’m cheating! I’m not cheating. I’m not gay.
Hand Holding boy: Not that being gay is a bad thing! It’s a good thing!
My student: Right! But no, listen. We aren’t together, we just hold hands in public sometimes.
Hand Holding Boy: Especially on Friday nights. And weekends. And at away games.
My student: Because sometimes people will say shit and then we can punch them! And if the fight started because someone was being homophobic, coach won’t get mad at us.
Hand Holding Boy: Always nice to punch a homophobe. And [gesturing to another boy in the group] maybe they’ll think twice about saying something to [other boy’s name] if he ever gets a boyfriend and wants to hold his hand for real.
The Gay One, resigned but smiling: I’ve decided it’s sweet and not really fucking weird.
This is what “boys will be boys” is meant to be
This is the best thing I’ve seen in a while.
No-fault divorce is actually very recent. That is, a divorce just because you wanted to get divorced and not because they were guilty of some provable transgression. California’s no-fault divorce law was 1966; the latest US state, it was 2010. When I was in Catholic school, we were taught to believe in and promote anti-no-fault-divorce positions. This is very recent history, and you cannot take even this for granted. Stop being “edgy” about feminism and its flaws. Every movement will have some flaws. But do you not think that this, and the risk it represents, is significant to women as a class of all backgrounds?
it’s literally as simple as “if you are against no-fault divorce, you believe that men should be able to own women like property”.
This is just too awesome! Ron Perlman just made mini-Hellboy's day!
I got to work on a show with Ron Perlman about 30 years ago. He was just the kindest guy you had ever met. That shoot was real tough, and he is one of the good memories from production.
I've seen him maybe twice since then, and he's remembered me both times. It's something that matters, you know?
I hung out with Ron Perlman for two weeks, in Budapest, but I tend to forget that I ever hung out with Ron in Budapest, and would tend reflexively to put him in the category of people I have never met, because he was always in full Hellboy costume and make-up. Hellboy was incredibly nice.
The only tiktok trend that matters is people filming those easter chickens and then going “who did ____ without permission?” and one of the chickens is so fucked up and its obvious who the answer is and the intro to You Gotta Move by Mississippi Fred McDowell is blasting
LEAVE THESE ANIMALS ALONE!!!
I need UK journalists to not show 43 degrees is not beach weather like people are gonna die
Americans do not interact
Im Australian, and 43C is NOT beach weather. That is VERY hot, even for us, but for the UK its apocalyptic. At 43C you should not even be going outside if you can help it, treating it like beach weather is a one way ticket to heatstroke.
I agree with not going outside for long periods of time but you will have to plan something to reduce the heat within your households. Especially if your house is designed to retain heat
Fans pointed at open windows will pull out hot air and allow it to circulate - don't put them IN the window, leave some room by the side for extra air to get drawn in.
If you can't afford cold packs (and if you can, stock up on some NOW), get some ziplock bags and freeze them, with wet washcloths or ripped up towel inside. You want them to be ready in the freezer when you need them. Wrap them in a tea towel and put them on your wrists and ankles.
A big bowl of ice water in front of a fan will blow cold air into the room and make a massive difference. Again, if you don't have ice cube trays get some and freeze them *now*, don't wait until you're already in trouble (although I am melting at quarter past nine but my thermoregulation is bollocks so I don't know if that's the heat or just the me). If you can't afford to get any, clean out empty yoghurt pots or Tupperware or whatever you have that can hold water. Even if you end up with a giant ice cube from a lunchbox, it'll help.
Even just opening two windows at a crack will allow some air circulation - I sometimes prop open my bedroom door and leave the bathroom door open, both windows are locked at a crack because of the cats but it creates a nice little line of wind along the landing.
If you're someone who needs something on them to sleep, take your duvet out of the cover and just use the cover.
Remember that water acts as a lens - you do NOT want to wear a wet t shirt in the burning sun. I did this when I was 8 and if I tan on my back you can still see the scars.
Read the instructions for sunscreen carefully, and use the highest spf you can find. Reapply as per the instructions. If you get burned, Malibu do an amazing aloe-based spray on after sun, I got mine from Savers for 3 quid and it lasts ages. I keep it and any other after sun in the fridge, which means it's incredibly lovely to put on. Aloe is magic for burns so definitely gravitate towards that if you can. My son got badly burned (he's ginger, he went to an outdoor pool and they forgot to give him sunscreen) and he's had 2 helpings of it and you wouldn't believe how much better he is (he couldn't even really wear a shirt).
Make sure your pets have plenty of fresh cold water to drink, and if they usually have dry food consider giving them some wet food for one of their meals (cats are notoriously not always great drinkers but wet food will get them some liquid). Keep the curtains and/or blinds closed in south-facing rooms. I have blackout curtains in the front room and the front bedroom (my son's) and they make a MASSIVE difference to the heat. Make sure pets have access to these cooler spaces if you can create them.
Keep oven/hob use to a minimum if you can. I like making a massive pot of something that can be reheated in the microwave if necessary - the oven especially adds a lot of heat. Or get some wraps and ham and cheese and eat those.
Cordial or fruit juice can be better than water if you're sweating a lot. Cordial is cheap as chips. Salty snacks are also good.
Go to Iceland and buy a billion lolly ices. It's especially a good way to make sure kids stay hydrated.
I realize op asked for Americans not to interact, and whether or not they're being cheeky, I feel obligated to reblog this to save lives.
That temperature is absolutely murder, even moreso with humidity.
Please, be safe and stay hydrated!
For reference, 43 degrees celsius is roughly equivalent to 109.4 degrees fahrenheit. That’s bad.
This is nearly DOUBLE the typical average temperature of the UK. I don't care if you grew up in Satan's asshole, if you woke up one day and it was twice as hot as it usually is, you're gonna have a bad fucking time. The infrastructure is not built for 40+ degrees, and with the government doing... The thing it's doing, I doubt they're gonna even bother to help people, so people need to see things like this post to be able to help each other instead.
Heads up UK folks, we're looking at hitting 40°C again in about two weeks. Now's a great time to prepare however you can, figure out what you can do to make things more bearable
Putting a wet tea towel in the freezer for 20 minutes (in a freezer bag so it didn't stick to anything) then tying it to my wrists/ankles helped a lot last year, so I'll share this post in the run up in case it helps anyone else
Keep an eye out for people struggling, including yourself
